The Motto Which Motivates Me The Most

Writer's note: It's quite a personal non-fiction. Well, it was written about almost one year ago. It's definitely not well-written. My life had changed a lot, too, which makes these things here not so relevant anymore. But this would be a fragment of my emotion at one point in my life.

Actually, I do not purely believe in mottos. I had not heard a motto that was able to be used in any condition. However, I was forced to choose a motto. Let’s say I have some mottos in my life. I nonetheless choose the motto that has been proved to be true in many conditions. It probably was simple and common for many people. Nevertheless, I will try to make you understand how important it is to me in my life. The motto that motivates me the most in my whole life: “I have friends.”

Firstly, to make you understand what I will explain later, I will explain one thing first. I have a rule that “Someone is your friend does not mean you are his friend.” I mean someone is your friend if you consider him as your friend. However, you are not his friend unless he considers you as his friends. Thus, in this page, if I say “A is B’s friend” it means that “A” considers “B” as his friend no matter “B” considers “A” as his friend or not. Do not forget this rule.

Actually, I will never ever be able to really tell you how much they have affected me. My story cannot be summed up in two or three pages; it cannot be packaged into something simple that you could understand easily.

I will begin to explain the reasons now. Honestly, I am not a good person. In addition, I had thought about living alone when I was in 3rd grade of primary school and I had thought about suicide when I was in 5th grade. You may think that I have a “hard life”. I apologize that I cannot tell more about it.

If at this point you think that I told these to my best friends and they had motivated me to live this life fully until now, I have to apologize once more time. I have never told them up until now. Furthermore, it is the first time I tell this to someone else. I do not want to beg for someone’s sorry or concern.

My friends kept me alive with their own way that they have never realised. What makes me alive is the time I have passed with them. When I graduated from primary school, almost all of my friends (remember the rule) went to the different school with me. Luckily, I met even more wonderful friends.

Even I was always sad when we went home early from school and when a long holiday came. However, I did not show it. I just kept that feeling in my heart. I knew that those were able to make them happy so that I should feel happy for them. Furthermore, even they were in my dream on a one-week holiday. I realise that everyone should love God, himself, and his family first before their friends. I nonetheless cannot help loving my friends. They are truly an important part in my life. They always have a special space in my heart. By the way, another rule of mine is that God, my family, and I are my friends. Actually, everyone is my friend (remember the rule) as long as I feel he is.

Now it is time for me to give some experiences. When I was in 8th grade, I felt so desperate for days because I did not think I was my friends’ friend. I felt like losing a purpose in life. I had no better choice than telling that to some friends. Since this life is not a soap opera, do not think that they said, “We are your friends, Fred.” That would be disgusting and dishonest. Luckily, telling them helped me to realise that it was not important. That desperation born a statement that, “If I want someone to consider me as his friend, I have nothing to do but try my best to show that I was deserved to be his friend.”

I will tell you another experience. When I was in 9th grade, I went into the biggest desperation in my life for months. I thought that I was slowly losing all my friends. I was certainly in despair. I began to regret every single thing I did wrong in life, every single chance I had missed, every single sacrifice I had refused to do, and many else. I had tried many things. I nonetheless had not managed to say that was wrong. At last, I thought it was “God’s plan” so that I could leave all of them without hurt. I believe that they are still my friends. They did not change. It was me who changed.

To sum up, thinking that “I have friends” motivated me a lot. No matter what you think about the motto, I love that simple motto. Although perhaps it cannot be considered as a real motto, I choose it. It had helped me in many events through my whole pre-teen and teenage life. It proved that the motto is true. It is my best motto. No matter what you think about this, I have friends and that is all that matters.